Happy 2013. We made it through the hoopla that was the 2012 , and now we are full on entering another cycle of planetary rotations.
The beginning of 2013 was very challenging for me. I agreed to go to the states at the request of dear, dear friends who are like my family to participate in the Jivamukti Yoga gathering. But leaving the beauty and warmth and relaxation of Belize to go to New York City in January was a hard thing for me to do (to put it mildly.) And then on top of that, travelling is always very hard on me and this time was no exception as I promptly caught a stomach virus going around that was very “cleansing” (to put it politely ; ) and then right as I was recovering from that, I caught an upper respiratory infection. And then, to top that off, all the traveling made my hip go out again which completely seized up my lower back and I could not sit for 3 days and it hurt to stand or walk, so mostly I had to just lay flat on my back and meditate and pray.
So that was my “Welcome To 2013”! I certainly hope yours was a little more gentle and kind.
In this new year, I am committed to finding ways to create better and more opportunities for right livelihood. I of course will continue to support and be part of all the good work I believe in. I am however, more and more, faced with the reality that during the time I was earning the most income, I was giving most of it away to support my non-profit team and other non-profit organizations whose work is important to me. And now, as each year passes, although I still have hundreds upon hundreds of requests to come speak and participate with numerous organizations, events, etc… very few of them come with financial green energy reciprocity. Many people it seem want and value what I have to contribute, but do not seem to honor that with any green energy contribution in return or offer so little that it makes it unviable for me.
I do a lot in the world of barter. I live very simply and keep my expenses relatively low. And at the same time, the reality is that in today’s world, it does take green energy (my name for money, in case you aren’t clear) to survive.
It is interesting for me to notice (and do my best to not get triggered!) all the different opinions and beliefs about what I “should” and “shouldn’t” be doing with my life. Some people, who tell me these things, mean very well and don’t get how it might feel for me to have so many people trying to direct my life. Other people are not well meaning at all they are just mean.
And as any of you have read my blogs over time know, I openly post my thoughts, feelings, experiences, and process. I don’t edit them to make them “nice” or to not offend or upset. My posts are just like me—raw, open, real. I only know how to be me—doesn’t matter the situation. I write about it all because I know I am not the only one who struggles and deals, laughs and celebrates, grieves and cries. I feel the best thing I have to offer is myself. It is all I have to offer really. It is not so that people will say, “Oh, Julia Butterfly is great!” or, “Julia Butterfly is evil!” It is just that there is something powerful in sharing story. Fiction or non-fiction. Stories for us are a powerful medium of communication, and when we see our own story in some way reflected in another’s it gives us something—sometimes validation, sometimes insights, sometimes deeper questions and searching for our own truth—but it gives us something.
So this blog, I share my challenge and commitment around creating right-livelihood. I share it because I know I am not the only person trying to figure this out in today’s reality—how to do what we believe in and are committed to while at the same time trying to balance that with self-care.
As of yet, I do not have the answers; I only know I am committed to searching them out.
Here is to a happy, healthy, and thriving 2013!